


Remus's Little One

by Anonymous



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: ABDL, Age Play, Age Regression, Ageplay, Bed-Wetting, Bottom Sirius Black, Daddy Kink, Daddy!Remus, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Issues, Hurt/Comfort, Infantalism, Little Space, Little!Sirius, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sexual Roleplay, Top Remus Lupin, Watersports, ddlb, littlespace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-03-18
Packaged: 2019-11-23 19:42:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18156200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Just two chapters of ageplay between Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. PWP. Check the tags for more info.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Ageplay? Like, you know what you clicked on. I know it's a controversial kink and I was hesitant to even post it (hence posting on anon).

Remus arrived at Emmeline Vance’s home before the rest of the Marauders in spite of having come from much further away. Peter was next to arrive, joining him at the table. This was a temporary location for the Order of the Phoenix meetings to be held, and everyone was on edge after the last hideout had been discovered. There was an uneasy suspicion of other members that hadn’t been there before.

“You look tired,” Peter had told him unflatteringly when he sat down. Remus knew what he looked like. Walking among werewolves every day was taking a toll on him. He’d tried to look nice enough to make up for it, wearing a new sweater over a button up top bought with James’s money, new trousers, and even nice oxfords. All of the new clothes and neatness didn’t make up for not sleeping enough at night. Other werewolves made him too jumpy to get a good night’s sleep.

“Thanks Peter,” he said dryly. “How have you been?”

“Too busy lately,” Peter admitted, and he did sound strained from work.

Then James and Sirius walked in the room. They were respectfully quiet, but of course some of the last members to show up. Sirius’s hair was a little longer (perhaps he was too busy to get it cut, although James managed to keep his the same length), and wore one of the ridiculous matching sweaters that he and James bought, proudly emblazoned with a phoenix. His leather motorcycle jacket was in his arms. He looked tired and unhappy in spite of the cheery greeting to Emmeline Vance. 

He plopped down next to Remus (James knew exactly how close they’d grown, so he situated himself next to Peter) and slung an arm around him in a one armed hug.

“Missed you,” he said instead of a polite hello, and it meant more to Remus too.

“I missed you too,” Remus told him.

“Think we could go talk a bit before the meeting starts?” Sirius asked.

“After,” Remus told him, shaking his head. 

———————

After the meeting they walked down to an out of the way part of the house, near the laundry. Remus thought it was a bad idea since people were already suspicious of Sirius due to his relation to the Black family, but they did need time to talk and privacy.

“Could I come over to your place?” Sirius asked when they were out of earshot.

“We can’t. Dumbledore needs me to go back tonight,” Remus told him.

“Fuck,” Sirius cursed. He looked angry and upset at the same time, eyes a bit unfocused. Remus was certain that he was trying to come up with something to convince him otherwise.

“It’s really important or I would stay with you,” Remus told him. He slid his arms around him. They weren’t exactly hiding their relationship, but they weren’t exactly open about it either. Everyone accepted the need for comfort during this time- he didn’t think that if anyone saw them they would think anything of it.

Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus’s waist tightly. “Please Remus? Just for tonight? I’ll stay at your flat so you can keep doing whatever it is that Dumbledore has you working on,” Sirius said.

“We… can’t,” Remus told him hesitantly. He wanted to- it would be all too easy. Remus was lonely. He just wasn’t allowed to give anyone his location or let them know what he was doing- not even his friends.

Yet Sirius looked upset- were his eyes watery with unshed tears as he looked up at him pleadingly? How much of that was put on for the sake of persuasion?

“Remus-“

“Dumbledore’s not letting me bring anyone over. You know that. I really would, but I promised him that I wouldn’t,” Remus said.

“He wouldn’t have to know and you know that I wouldn’t say anything. I would never do anything to wreck a mission. I just really need to be with you tonight. I… we had a really rough mission and I just need you,” Sirius told him. 

At some point they had shifted against the wall- definitely more than a friendly comforting embrace and more like two desperate lovers seeking out a private moment together.

Remus glanced around and realized that James was further down the corridor, keeping some sort of watch for them as if he knew that they needed the privacy.

He sighed and rubbed over Sirius’s shoulders, pulling back from him just a little. “I want to have you stay. I do. You know that I can’t betray Dumbledore’s trust,” Remus told him firmly.

“Then stay with me. Just one night? I need you,” Sirius told him, sounding almost desperate.

“I would, but let’s try asking Dumbledore later. I’ll ask for a few days off and-“

“It’s been too long since I’ve seen you,” Sirius interrupted, and he was teary eyed now. Remus reached up with both hands to wipe his cheeks dry. “I had a bad mission with this Death Eater- I swear he looked like Regulus. I tried talking to my family after and it all went to shit- just what you’d expect. It was a terrible idea, but I still talked to them. I can’t get my head on straight since then. I just need you. Please Remus?”

Remus swallowed and pressed a kiss to his cheek. It wasn’t just manipulation to get them more time together, but it was still something that could wait and should wait- something that Sirius should be dealing with by himself or with closer friends rather than interrupting a mission. Dumbledore was understanding enough with relationships and family obligations with the Order, but a little bit of family angst from an estrangement that was already settled and done…

“I know that it was bad. You’re okay though. You’re fine. You’ll be fine after a few days. I would ask Dumbledore, but it’s not urgent. I won’t go home with you tonight, but I will ask for a few days so that we can spend some time together,” Remus told him.

“But I need you,” Sirius said, and he sounded broken enough that Remus could almost cave.

“Look, it’s not an emergency. No one has died. No one is in St. Mungo’s. Those are the sorts of things that people take time off for- this isn’t important enough to take time off without warning Dumbledore. I’m sure that Dumbledore will approve some time off soon if-“

And then Sirius was sobbing into his chest, clutching his sweater tightly in fistfuls.

“Please? Just… please?” Sirius said shakily. “I know it’s not a good reason. I know. Just… please Remus?”

“Okay,” Remus finally gave in to him, holding him closer and patting his back. “I’ll come home with you.”

“Thank you,” Sirius said. He smiled up at him, still teary eyed and pressed their lips together in a quick kiss.

His demeanor had changed quickly enough that Remus had doubts about it and wondered if he had been manipulated, but he wasn’t going to go back on it now.

“Let’s go,” Remus said quietly.

“You okay?” James asked them when they caught up to him in the corridor.

“Fine,” Sirius said. “Remus is staying at my place tonight.”

James glanced between them. “Okay,” he said, a hint of a smile on his lips.

“See you tomorrow for lunch,” Sirius told him.

“Sounds good,” James said.

They said their goodbyes to the few stragglers that lingered at Emmeline’s home, before heading out.

Sirius led Remus to his motorbike and climbed on.

Remus wrinkled his nose. “I think I might just apparate. I’ll meet you there?”

There was a flicker of hesitation in Sirius’s eyes. He looked as if he was struggling to tell him something or warn him. “Sure. Sorry it’s a terrible mess. I’ll meet you there.”  He sped off and into the sky.

Remus apparated and was instantly in Sirius’s flat.

He looked around the living area, realizing that Sirius had understated the mess. It looked as if he had been too busy to bother with cleaning for several weeks.

Remus sighed and settled into tidying up a bit before Sirius got home. He gathered up pizza boxes and take out containers and took them out to the trash. He cast a few charms to get rid of any insects or bugs that may have made their way into the flat, disgusted by the thought and not willing to take any chances with the state of the flat. He cleaned up the kitchen counters and headed to the bedroom.

The dirty clothes strewn on the floor in Sirius’s bedroom were easy enough to put in a pile to be cleaned later. He made the bed with a wave of his wand, and then frowned. He picked up a baby bottle off of the floor. Lily was still pregnant, and he couldn’t think of anyone else Sirius was close with who had children. He carried it to the kitchen and cleaned it, setting it on the counter.

He went to the loo, cleaning up the mess in there as well.

“I’m home,” Sirius called. 

Remus stepped out of the loo and smiled.

“You didn’t have to clean,” Sirius said guiltily.

“I really did,” Remus said. “The mess was a bit bad.”

“Sorry. I’ve been busy. I’ve stayed at James and Lily’s some, so I neglected it a bit,” Sirius said.

“Well, it’s livable now,” Remus said.

Sirius nodded. He set his leather jacket on the armchair and hurried over to him, wrapping his arms around him tightly. “Did I tell you that I missed you?”

“Several times. I missed you too,” Remus told him.

Sirius smiled up at him. He still looked tired and now that Remus was looking at him more closely, instead of half trying to watch for others at Emmeline’s house, he looked troubled and sad beneath the smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“Let’s go lay down,” Remus told him, taking his hand and leading him to the bedroom.

Sirius followed him and sunk down onto the bed. They undressed quietly, stripping down to just their y-fronts. 

Remus tugged Sirius close against him, curling around his back. He had to move some of his long hair to the side and out of his face, getting settled.

“Thank you for coming home with me,” Sirius said quietly. He seemed curled in on himself and tucked against Remus, tugging his arm around him and holding onto his hand.

“I really wanted to stay. We’ll tell Dumbledore that you were sick or something,” Remus said.

“We’ll think of something,” Sirius agreed. He yawned and pressed a kiss to Remus’s knuckles, still holding his hand.

“Do you want to talk about what happened with your family?” Remus asked.

“I just want to lay here with you,” Sirius said. “Not much to talk about other than they’re all idiots and still hate me.”

Remus frowned, knowing that Sirius was more bothered by it than he said, but not knowing how to talk about it.

“It’s ridiculous that it still hurts that they hate me, even after years of it,” Sirius said more quietly.

Remus squeezed him tightly. “I love you,” he told him, pressing a kiss to his neck.

“I love you too,” Sirius said, and it almost hurt that he sounded so relieved, as if he didn’t know.

They lay curled up together for a while until they dozed off, both of them more tired than they realized.

———————-

Sirius was awake before he was, and Remus couldn’t even complain about being awoken since he was delightfully affectionate that morning. Sirius was tucked up against his chest, pressing small kisses to his neck and up beside his ear, the noises sounding far louder than they were due to proximity.

“This is a nice way to wake up,” Remus said.

“You could wake up like this every morning, but you won’t show me where your flat is,” Sirius said.

Remus sighed. “Don’t. I don’t want to talk about it right now,” he said, pulling away and sitting up.

“Sorry,” Sirius said. “It’s true though. Maybe Dumbledore’s just a self loathing bastard. James and Lily can stay together. Marlene and-“

“The only reason you’re not allowed to know where I’m living at is because I’m with werewolves. Dumbledore doesn’t even know about us- not really. It’s just dangerous. Too dangerous for you to come along,” Remus said. He tugged on his sweater.

He scrunched up his face when he felt a long tongue over his cheek. He looked to his side and Sirius was a large black dog, thumping his tail against the mattress.

“No. I’m not taking you there. Understood?” Remus said.

The dog hung his head, ears going back before switching back into Sirius’s normal form.

Remus tugged on his trousers. “Don’t look at me like that. What do you want for breakfast?”

“Eggs are fine,” Sirius said, arms crossed. He was sulking.

Remus sighed and pulled out one of Sirius’s band t-shirts from the pile. He cleaned it and tossed it to him.

He went to the kitchen and started making breakfast for them both, glad to find that the eggs were still good even if not much else in the refrigerator was.

Sirius followed him into the kitchen a moment later, just wearing the band shirt and his y-fronts. He sat down on a bar stool. “Do you think Dumbledore would give you some time off if you asked?”

“I hope so, but I don’t know. We don’t have a good reason. You’re fine. I’m fine. There are people in the Order that need the time off far more than we do,” Remus told him.

“I know,” Sirius said, frowning.

Remus glanced back at him. “It might help both of us, having some time off. He might do it if he thinks that we’ll do a better job,” he said.

“Right. It would help,” Sirius said. “I can’t focus as much as I should be.”

“I will ask him,” Remus reassured him.  He reached up into the pantry for spices, but paused, looking at a large can of powdered infant formula. “Did one of our friends have a baby and not say anything?”

“No, not that I know of,” Sirius said. “Why?”

“Whose is this?” Remus asked, holding up the formula.

“Oh,” Sirius said. He looked uneasy and didn’t answer.

“Sirius?” Remus asked. It was an odd lack of response.

Sirius just stared at him for a moment, face puce colored. “It’s mine,” he said.

“Yours?” Remus asked, brows knitting. That was so far from any sensible answer that it was difficult to make anything add up. “You don’t have children that I know of, unless you’re trying to tell me something. If you are, I don’t think that I want to hear it.”

“No. No children. It’s mine. I drink it,” Sirius said.

“Oh,” Remus said, relaxing a little over the fact that Sirius hadn’t been with some woman and that there were no accidental surprise babies. It still didn’t add up though. “You drink it?”

“Y-yes,” Sirius said, answer somewhat halting. He was still puce colored and looked scared.

“Why?” Remus asked.

“It’s weird,” Sirius told him. “Completely weird.”

“This is already weird,” Remus said.

“The eggs are burning,” Sirius said.

“Shit,” Remus cursed. He dealt with that, taking them off the heat. He dumped them in the trash and set the pan on an empty burner. He turned off the stove. “Right… I’ll make eggs in a minute. We’re going to talk about whatever this is.” He gestured towards the infant formula. 

“Could it wait until after breakfast?” Sirius asked, shifting nervously. “I don’t exactly know how to tell you about it yet.”

“I’d rather we talk about it now,” Remus said. He’d obviously surprised Sirius with it, and caught him off guard. Sirius was very bright and he could concoct a believable lie in no time at all. Remus wanted a genuine answer.

“Right. Well, erm… I suppose that it’s just… You know that I had a hard time with my family. I sort of… everything’s all a bit mixed up in my head sometimes, so it’s hard to cope with all of that. My parents didn’t really love me, and so I do have problems… I use that to cope with that,” Sirius said.

Remus stared at him, trying to make sense out of that non-answer. It was sincere at the very least, and Sirius looked vulnerable, sitting there on the bar stool with crossed arms and pale face.

He sat down next to Sirius. “You drink infant formula because your parents didn’t love you?” he asked, repeating basically what Sirius had said, it sounding somehow even more absurd.

Sirius’s cheeks went red at that. “Sort of,” he mumbled. “That’s not all of it or even… I don’t know where to begin explaining.”

“We can talk about it after breakfast then,” Remus decided. He had enough sincerity out of him and this was strange enough that he was certain Sirius couldn’t manage anything but the truth at this point.

“Thank you,” Sirius said weakly, relieved. 

Remus sighed and cleaned off the pan with burnt egg at the bottom. He paused and lifted up the bottle he’d cleaned the night before. He raised an eyebrow questioningly at Sirius.

“Also mine,” Sirius said quietly, taking it from him and setting it by the formula.

Remus frowned and went back to the pan. He cooked the eggs in silence, letting Sirius have the time to collect his thoughts. When they were finished cooking, he served them both plates. He turned off the stove and carried the plates to the table.

“So…” he said, once Sirius had settled across from him.

“It’s complicated, and you might think I’m a bit mad,” Sirius warned him.

“I’m sure it’s not that awful,” Remus reassured him. He looked so vulnerable and anxious.

Sirius shook his head. “It’s really out there,” he insisted, picking at his eggs.

“It’s fine,” Remus told him reaching over and taking his hand.

Sirius nodded and was quiet for a moment. “I have had a really hard time with my family and problems with my childhood- more than I talk about,” he admitted.

Remus squeezed his hand gently. “I know,” he said. Sirius had run away from home while they were still in school. He knew that it had been very difficult for him.

“I mean that it’s very hard. It’s still hard. It still hurts,” Sirius told him, as if he didn’t understand at all and couldn't know. “Not every day, but it does still hurt that everything is such a mess with my family. It’s… it’s really hard.”

“I know that it’s not something you just get over. I know that you don’t like them, but it’s always hard not having a family. It’s okay that you’re still bothered by it,” Remus said, beginning to realize that even though he did  _ know _ , he might not realize the depths of the problem. He knew that Sirius was troubled in school and that his problems with his family made life very difficult. It seemed like the trauma ran deeper than he had realized.

“It’s still hard,” Sirius repeated, looking anxious still. He looked oddly fragile, sitting across from Remus at the breakfast table and trying to explain something he felt so vulnerable about. He was wide eyed and a bit jumpy, tapping at the table. “Very hard. I have bad days with it.”

“It’s okay,” Remus reassured him, then hesitated. “Days bad enough that you drink infant formula as a … a coping mechanism?”

Sirius’s face reddened at that, and he pulled his hand away. “Sort of, but not exactly. I wouldn’t have to do it necessarily, but it is comforting. It’s… shit, Remus, like I said, it’s very strange. I just pretend for a while that I am very small again- young. I pretend that I’m young and cared for, and that I don’t have to worry about my family or the Order or this stupid war or anything else. I just spend some time pretending that everything is okay again.”

Remus was quiet while Sirius explained, and just tried to take it in to understand what he was getting at with all of this. He frowned, eyebrows drawn together in puzzlement.

“Anyway, it’s all a mess,” Sirius rushed on with his explanation, filling the silence. “It’s all tied up together really. You know how some blokes like the whole ‘Daddy’ thing in bed?”

Remus nearly choked on his eggs at that. “Yes,” he said, even more confused than he had been before.

“Right. So I like that- not being called ‘Daddy’ obviously, but the other way around. Except it’s such a mess and all tied up with my issues with my family. It’s a mess and weird and I don’t want you to hate me for it,” Sirius told him, genuinely worried.

“I don’t hate you,” Remus told him. Sirius was still red faced and flustered. He looked entirely too vulnerable. Remus needed to reassure him even though this still wasn’t entirely making sense. It was at least  _ starting _ to make sense.

Sirius chewed at his lip. “So, when I’m alone I pretend to be about three years old or so- and as if I’m being taken care of while I do. It’s a bit tied up with the sort of thing odd blokes do in the bedroom- calling someone ‘Daddy’ and all of that. It’s not exactly the same of course, since that’s more about fucking than this is,” he told him. “It’s similar though.”

Remus took all of that in, uneasy at first. “You act as if you’re three years old- and drink the infant formula out of the bottle during all of this?” he asked, managing to sound calm. Sirius was right– it was  _ weird _ .

“Er, yes,” Sirius confirmed, picking at his eggs again. 

“And it helps?” Remus asked.

“It helps,” Sirius said quietly. 

“So you erm… do you want to give me a run through of what you do exactly?” Remus asked.

“What do you mean?” Sirius asked.

“I mean… do you fix up a bottle of formula, and lay about the house, imagining some fictionalized father figure taking care of you? Do you do that?” Remus asked.

“Sort of,” Sirius said. “I usually wear pyjamas and lay in the bed for a bit. I usually imagine you rather than anyone else with me. So I picture you taking care of me a bit– sometimes feeding me the bottle or helping me into pyjamas or reading to me for a while.”

Remus looked away from him at that, surprised, but knowing he shouldn’t have been. Of course, Sirius would have been imagining him, since he’d mentioned… “So it’s somehow related to the whole calling someone ‘Daddy’ in the bedroom thing? Do you erm, just drink formula for a bit and picture all of that and then… do you wank to it?” 

Sirius licked his lips, squirming in the seat across from Remus. “Sometimes. Other times I don’t. Sometimes I do though,” he admitted. “It’s more about being taken care of and loved for a bit though.”

“You know I love you,” Remus said.

“I know. It’s just… sometimes it’s soothing to not have to deal with everything else for a bit, and just imagine being taken care of,” Sirius said, running his fingers through his hair. Remus noticed that for all of the picking at his breakfast, he hadn’t managed to eat much of it. “It helps me cope with everything. I spend a lot of time alone anyway. It’s like a bad habit. I started doing it at home during the summers when I was in school, just mostly pretending I’d find a new dad that would take me away from home to live with him.”

Remus frowned at that. “Were you ever interested in James’s dad?” he asked.

“No! No, never. Never. He’s great and all, but it was really… I just wanted someone our age or just a bit older really, that way I could just pretend. It was like I could get back a bit of what I lost from not having normal parents- as if someone could make it better. Of course, you can’t really ever get your childhood back and fix it that way, but pretending for a bit just… it lets me ignore the hard stuff when I need to, and feel good for a bit,” Sirius said, going on a bit of a tangent that Remus thought was more revealing than he intended.

“So you need to feel cared for,” Remus said quietly.

“Yes,” Sirius said, and it was almost needy.

“You want me to feed you bottles and treat you like a three year old?” Remus asked.

“I couldn’t ask for that. I mean, if you weren’t disturbed by it all, then yes- I do think about it. I couldn’t ask you to do that,” Sirius said.

“But all of this is… somehow still something that you wank over?” Remus asked, still trying to figure out how that tied into this.

“I don’t even know how to explain it. I mentioned that it’s all a mess. I want cared for and loved while I’m pretending to be very small. Since I’m imagining you doing it, then it just makes sense for that to be a part of it,” Sirius said.

“Could you just… what do you imagine both of us doing while you’re wanking? Are you picturing me feeding you a bottle and then it’s just ‘well, might as well get my cock sucked too’ or something?” Remus asked. “How does it happen when you imagine it?”

“Erm… it’s not that abrupt,” Sirius said, with a nervous laugh. At least he wasn’t as panicked as he was before. “Usually you’ll feed me a bottle and then we’ll do other stuff. You’ll give me a bath or read to me or something. Then I’ll have an accident. I mean, we’ve played a bit with piss before, so it didn’t seem that far of a stretch… so I usually piss myself and you clean me up. While you’re doing that, you usually give me a handjob as part of it.”

Remus was the one to be embarrassed over that. He usually was the one pissing on Sirius, but the idea of Sirius wetting himself was appealing. “Do you actually wet yourself while you’re pretending that all of this is happening?”

“Usually,” Sirius said with a slight smirk. As nervous as he was, he could tell when something caught Remus’s interest. 

Remus inhaled sharply at the thought, looking at him. He could imagine Sirius laying on the bed, just staring up at him as he soaked his y-fronts and sheets. 

“You could watch sometime,” Sirius offered offhandedly as if he didn’t realize that Remus was thinking about it.

“Yeah. I will,” Remus said. He pursed his lips, deciding to get back to the more important topic at hand. “So… I just treat you like a three year old for a bit, then you have an accident, and I clean it up, but get a bit handsy?”

“That’s… about it. You usually tell me that you love me and that I’m a good boy too,” Sirius said. 

“Your father never molested you did he?” Remus asked quietly.

“No. Neither one of my parents laid a hand on me like that,” Sirius reassured him. “I just have a strange desire to call my boyfriend ‘Daddy.’ Nothing else weird going on other than just having a bad childhood and strange coping mechanisms.”

Remus tapped at the table then as he kept considering it. “Let me think about it for a while,” he said. “I don’t mind that you do it by yourself, but let me think about it before I decide about us doing all of that together.”

Sirius’s shoulders slumped in relief, eyes wide with surprise. “That’s more than I could ask for,” he said. He stood suddenly and walked around the table. 

Remus smiled when Sirius’s arms were flung around him, squeezing him tightly. 

“I’m just glad you aren’t angry about it,” Sirius said, ducking his head down against Remus’s shoulder, not letting go.

“I’m not angry. I’ll have to think it over for a while, but I don’t mind that you do it by yourself at all– especially if it helps,” Remus said, wrapping his arms around him. It was out there, and he wasn’t sure how attractive he would find it. “I just need some time to think about whether it’s something I can do with you.” 

“That’s fine. I’m just happy that it’s okay,” Sirius said, still clinging to him.

Remus kissed his neck softly and tugged him into his lap, holding him in his arms. Sirius curled up against him, still visibly a bit shaken from the discussion in spite of being calmer. He was still vulnerable somehow, more drawn in on himself and tucked against Remus. He ran his fingers through the silky black locks of hair, just holding him for the moment.

“You should eat your breakfast that way you’re not subsisting on pizza and take out food. Do James and Lily at least make decent meals?” Remus asked.

“They do. I usually meet them at least for lunch, if not dinner too,” Sirius said, getting up and sitting back in his chair. He ate his eggs more enthusiastically now. “You ought to come visit.”

“I can’t today. I really need to be going,” Remus said.

Sirius’s face fell. “I wish you could stay.”

“I’ll ask Dumbledore for some time off. I can’t imagine that he’ll say no if I can come up with good enough reasoning,” Remus said. He did need to spend some time with Sirius.

“Right,” Sirius said. “Do you have to leave right away?”

“I’ll stay for you to finish breakfast, but afterwards I need to head out. I’ve already been gone far too long,” Remus told him. 

“Would you stay for a quickie in the shower?” Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow. “You need to shower anyway.”

“I think we can manage that,” Remus said, not able to say no to Sirius’s teasing grin.

____________________

Remus had sent word to Sirius as soon as Dumbledore had approved his leave from the mission. He had only managed to get permission for sporadic leave. It was better to space the days out rather than having other werewolves be suspicious of his absence. The rough part was that he couldn’t plan for the days far enough in advance. He had to take what he could get.

He ended up deciding to surprise Sirius, mostly because an owl would take a while and they had so little time that it felt like a waste.

After secluding himself from the other werewolves he cleaned up and apparated to Sirius’s flat.

“Sirius, it’s me- Remus,” he announced.

“Remus?” Sirius called. He sounded surprised and elated. “Just a minute!”

Remus went to the bedroom door where Sirius’s voice was coming from. 

When he opened the door and saw Sirius there on his bed, he was struck with surprise.

Sirius looked up at him, wide eyed. “I said ‘just a minute,’” he said, voice a mixture of irritation and nervousness.  

He had a half full bottle of formula next to him on the bed. He was wearing pyjamas that looked as though they were designed for a child. A graphic print of a lion cub roared and chased a bowtruckle on his pyjama top. The letters on the front read ‘Future Gryffindor.’ The bottoms were a matching red and gold. 

There was a few toys strewn about the room (mostly miniature motorbikes and cars) as well as some parchment with childish drawings, and fairy tale books.

“Sorry,” Remus apologized awkwardly, lingering in the doorway. Even though Sirius had described what he did during all of this, it was somehow more tragic seeing it in person. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“S’fine,” Sirius said uncomfortably. “Do you want to go wait in the main room while I clean up?”

“Erm… did you want to finish what you were doing?” Remus asked.

“Nah. You’re here. That’s loads better,” Sirius said.

“Are you sure? I could watch,” Remus suggested. “You know- to get a better idea about all of this.”

“You’d want to watch?” Sirius asked skeptically.

“I think so. It would give me a chance to see if this is something that I would want to do with you sometime,” Remus said. At the very least, he was concerned for Sirius. He was entirely unprepared for what he saw and was curious about exactly how far all of this went. He wanted to provide comfort, and it seemed that Sirius had a difficult time talking about things or even seeking comfort in the usual way.

Sirius’s brows were still furrowed and he was eyeing Remus with trepidation. “Are you sure? We could go see a muggle movie or have dinner if you haven’t eaten yet. We could do something else.”

“I’m sure,” Remus said. “I’d like to get a sense of it. It’s a bit different seeing all of this than just hearing about it. I’d like to watch, if you don’t mind,” Remus said.

“I don’t mind,” Sirius said. “It is… I’m afraid that you won’t like it.”

“Then we’ll stop and do something else if I don’t. You can keep doing all of this is private,” Remus said reasonably.

“I suppose,” Sirius said, considering it.

“Only if you are fine with me watching though,” Remus added.

Sirius licked his lips. ”Are you sure that you want to watch all of this?” he asked.

“If you’ll let me,” Remus said.

Sirius still looked hesitant, and even afraid. After a moment resolve set in and he saw his shoulders square in determination.

When he spoke next, his voice was in a higher register and a bit more quiet. It sounded like put on childishness, yet there was something authentic and desperate that seeped through. “Are you sure, Daddy? Are you sure that you want to watch? Are you sure it’s okay if I’m three years old? Is it okay, Daddy?” he asked.

Remus’s lips parted in surprise- near shock. Sirius had significantly upped the ante of this discussion and for the first time, Remus felt a sliver of doubt about all of this. He wasn’t sure if Sirius was trying to scare him off, or if he had just been unprepared for the reality of it. There was something raw and broken about Sirius’s childish tone.

“I would just be watching,” Remus said.

“I know,” Sirius said, in the same voice that Remus was sure would take some time to get used to now. “Just watching. Daddy would just be watching.”

Remus still wasn’t sure if Sirius was trying to scare him out of this or just test him. He was definitely trying to see if Remus would drop it. He wasn’t yet sure how he felt about being called ‘Daddy.’

“Is it okay if I’m three years old, Daddy?” Sirius asked him again. It was odd hearing his voice at a higher octave that, yet while artificial, suited Sirius and this oddly needy and desperate type of pretend.

“Yes, that’s fine. I’ll watch. You can be three years old,” Remus said before he could think about it too much and back out.

“Okay. Daddy, come sit on the bed to watch?” he asked, patting the spot next to him.

Remus sank down next to him. He felt completely out of his element, but imagined that Sirius felt the same. Usually they discussed stuff that they wanted to add to their time spent in the bedroom, but this was more challenging. It was difficult to discuss and made both of them squirm. Remus couldn’t exactly read up about it since it seemed so much more personal than anything else they’d tried that was just a bit outside of the norm. Discussing it was far different from reality since this was more involved than Remus could have imagined.

Then Sirius picked up fairy tale book.

“I’m going to read to you now, Daddy,” Sirius said softly.

“Erm, okay,” Remus said.

“You don’t have to say stuff back to me if you don’t want to,” Sirius told him softly then. “You’re just watching. I just talk a lot.”

Remus felt a little relieved at that. He was worried about saying the wrong thing or being more involved than he was ready for with the conversation flowing between them. “Okay,” he agreed.

Sirius scooted up against him and curled up by his side. “This okay, Daddy? I like snuggling,” he said.

Remus nodded and slid an arm around his shoulder.

“Now I will read you the story,” Sirius said.  “Oh… on.. sss… wons… once.” Sirius pointed to each individual letter as he sounded the word out.

“Uh…puh... up… o… nnnnn,” Sirius spoke slowly and haltingly, although his voice remained high. It occurred to Remus that he was just letting him adjust to the sound of the affected childishness of his voice.

“Upon. Once upon a ta… tuh… I… mmm. Time. Once upon a time,” Sirius read. “Tuh… huhh… ehh… errr. Tuhhuhehherrr…”

“There,” Remus supplied, as if he were genuinely struggling with it. It slipped out before he could think about it.

“There,” Sirius said brightly. “Thank you, Daddy. That’s a hard word.”

“You’re welcome,” Remus said, feeling his cheeks and ears heat up with a blush.

“There once wuh wuh… ah… sss. Was. There once was a…” Sirius read. His bottom lip stuck out in a pout.

“Big words,” Sirius said quietly. “Too hard. I’ll show you pictures instead.”

He looked up at Remus, almost as if he were seeking approval. 

“It’s a very difficult book,” Remus told him.

Sirius nodded. “Hard,” he agreed. “I’m slow. I like pictures best.” 

“You’re not slow,” he said quickly. “It’s a hard book.”

“No, I’m slow,” Sirius mumbled, pointing to his head. He pointed back to the page. “The pictures are pretty though, see?”

Remus tightened his hold on him. “Did your mother call you slow?” he asked.

“I don’t have a mum,” Sirius said insistently. He pointed to a knight on the page. “He’s a brave knight. He’s a Gryffindor.”

“Sirius, you know that your mother was wrong,” Remus said.

Sirius threw the book across the room, startling Remus. It hit the wall with a loud smacking noise and fell to the floor. “Stupid book,” he muttered. “I don’t want to read no more.”

“You shouldn’t throw things-“

“You’re just watching, Daddy, remember?” Sirius reminded him.

That shut Remus up. 

Sirius grabbed the toy stuffed lion that he had. He wrapped his arms around it tightly, curling up around it. 

Remus hesitated before reaching over and rubbing his back soothingly.

When Sirius spoke again, his voice was low again and more serious. “Don’t mention my real parents during any of this,” he told him.

“I’m sorry,” Remus apologized. “I’m really sorry.” He curled around him and hugged him tightly.

Sirius turned and let go of the stuffed toy, wrapping his arms around Remus. “It’s okay, Daddy,” he said, voice not as high as it had been, but still not entirely normal. He cleared his throat.

When he spoke again it was happier- possibly falsely so- and high again with the same childish lilt. “I’m thirsty.”

Remus sat up, letting Sirius get up himself. 

Sirius grabbed his wand and cast a charm to warm his bottle that had been discarded until now. He set his wand back on the bedside table.

“Daddy, may I sit in your lap?” Sirius asked softly.

“Erm, of course,” Remus said.

Sirius smiled and climbed between his legs. He leaned back against Remus’s chest. It took a moment for them to both get comfortable, Remus propping himself up with pillows. Sirius leaned against his chest and grabbed his bottle.

He slipped the teat through parted lips, suckling softly on it.

At first watching Sirius drink a bottle was strange and made Remus just on the edge of uncomfortable. He could hear him suckle and it was by far the most childish thing that he had done so far. As he kept watching though, it became more normal. He was really just drinking something, even though it was a bottle- and infant formula.

“What does it taste like?” Remus asked curiously.

“Milk,” Sirius said, some if the formula dribbling down his chin. He wiped it up with his pyjama sleeve. “But sweeter. Very sweet milk.”

“Oh.”

“Do you want to taste, Daddy?” Sirius asked him.

“No, thank you,” Remus said politely.

Sirius nodded and went back to suckling.

It grew almost boring after that. If he hadn’t been holding Sirius in his lap and arms, it would have been dull, just watching him drink the bottle. 

Sirius seemed to sense his impending boredom since he looked up at him then. “It’s a yummy bottle,” he told him.

Remus wasn’t sure how to reply to that, so he took Sirius up on his earlier offer and refrained from talking.

“Very yummy,” Sirius continued, as if Remus weren’t just being awkwardly silent. “It’s warm. I was hungry. I’m too big for bottles, but I like them anyway.”

Remus smiled and squeezed him gently.

“I’d like it a lot if you would feed me bottles someday, Daddy,” Sirius told him.

“I could feed you now,” Remus suggested. It wasn’t going to be difficult at all. If it made Sirius happy then it would be well worth it.

“It’s almost empty,” Sirius told him. “We could go heat up more?”

“Erm, we could do that,” Remus agreed. 

Sirius handed him the bottle and slid off of the bed, going to the kitchen.

Remus followed behind him.

Sirius stood in the kitchen, looking unsure of himself. He looked at Remus, fidgeting.

“I’ll make the bottle,” Remus told him.

Sirius looked relieved then. “Thank you, Daddy,” he said with a smile.

Remus smiled back at him and heated up water on the stove. He rinsed out the bottle and grabbed the infant formula.

“I’m glad that you are going to feed me my bottle,” Sirius said softly, wrapping his arms around Remus’s waist.

Remus smiled, waiting for the water to heat up.

“Can I lay in your lap when you feed me?” Sirius asked.

“Of course,” Remus said.

“Good,” Sirius said brightly. “I like cuddling you. I like being taken care of by my Daddy.”

Remus was just grateful that Sirius seemed to fill the quiet, and it was nice feeling this appreciated. Everyone in the Order had expectations of him. It was nice that Sirius was so easy to please, even if it were a bit sad that he did seem to need this.

“I think about you feeding me a bottle a lot,” Sirius said softly. “It makes me feel warm and happy inside.” He nuzzled his face against Remus’s back. 

“I’m glad that it makes you happy,” Remus said softly.

“It makes me feel special. I’m Daddy’s little boy,” Sirius said.

“You are my little boy,” Remus said softly, even though it wasn’t entirely natural rolling off of his tongue.

That had the desired effect and even more than Remus anticipated. Sirius gave a delighted little squeal and hugged him tighter. He nuzzled his face against his back. “Daddy’s little boy,” he repeated.

“That’s right. You are my little boy,” Remus said.

“Very little,” Sirius said excitedly. “Daddy’s special little boy.”

“Very special,” Remus told him.

“Daddy’s little boy. Daddy’s little one. Daddy’s puppy. Daddy’s special boy. Daddy’s baby,” Sirius whispered all of these words near Remus’s ear, making him shiver at the warmth of his breath.

“That’s right,” Remus told him. “Daddy’s baby boy.”

Sirius let out a delighted squeal.

“That’s my ear,” Remus said, wincing.

“Sorry,” Sirius said apologetically, voice dropping for just a moment. Then it was childish again. “Sorry, Daddy.”

“It’s okay, you were just excited,” Remus reassured him. “Could you take a step back for a second? The stove is hot and I need to pour the water.”

“Okay, Daddy,” Sirius said, pulling back away from him.

Remus poured the water into the bottle and added the formula, stirring it.

“Ow!” Sirius said from beside him. 

Remus looked over and panicked, seeing Sirius’s hand on the hot stove. “Sirius!”

Sirius pulled his hand away. “Owie. I got hurt,” he whined.

Remus took hold of Sirius’s wrist in panic, eyes wide. 

“It’s not really hurt,” Sirius whispered.

Remus frowned, lightly touching Sirius’s pale fingertips. It was an impressive feat of nonverbal wandless magic to have protected his fingertips from the potential burn.

“It hurts, Daddy. Kiss it better?” Sirius asked.

Remus hesitated, but pressed his lips to his fingers. “You scared me,” he said.

“Sorry. I’m sorry, Daddy. Am I bad?” Sirius asked.

“No, you’re not bad. Come here,” Remus said, hugging him tightly.

“Not bad?” Sirius asked again. He sounded so worried that it made Remus’s heart ache for him. Even though this all seemed fairly odd, there was a great deal of genuine pain behind it that made Remus want to make everything better for Sirius.

“No, you’re not bad at all,” Remus reassured him. He remembered something Sirius had mentioned the time that they had discussed this. “You’re a very good boy, Sirius.”

Sirius sniffled at that, clutching at him tightly. “I’m not bad. Daddy’s good boy,” he said shakily.

“That’s right- a very good boy,” Remus told him.

“Can I have a bandage?” Sirius asked. “It hurts.”

“Just a moment,” Remus said. He turned off the stove and waved his wand, summoning bandages from the medicine cabinet. He frowned, looking at Sirius’s hand. “Where does it hurt?”

“Here,” Sirius said, pointing to one of his fingertips. “And this one… and this one…”

Remus wrapped the bandages around his fingertips, kissing them one by one.  “All better?” he asked softly.

“All better,” Sirius said, all smiles now although his eyes were still red and watery.

“Let’s go back to your room,” Remus told him.

“Yeah,” Sirius said softly, taking his hand. He followed Remus to the bedroom.

Once Remus had settled against the pillows, Sirius lay in his lap. Remus held him close in his arms.

“Thirsty,” Sirius told him quietly, looking up at him.

“I know,” Remus whispered.

Remus brought the bottle to Sirius’s mouth, resting the teat of it against Sirius’s lips. Sirius wrapped his lips around it and started suckling softly, drawing the warm formula into his mouth and swallowing it.

It was the strangest thing that they had done so far. Sirius was suckling the bottle like a baby, or at least like a toddler that needed the extra soothing and comfort. He stared up at Remus intently with the only break in their eye contact being their blinking. There was an intensity to the closeness they shared with the unbroken gaze between them. He clutched at Remus’s sweater, letting him hold the bottle and feed him. 

By the time that Sirius had finished half of the bottle, Remus was beginning to wonder where Sirius’s mind wandered during the silent feeding.

“What are you thinking about?” Remus asked gently, brushing his thumb over Sirius’s cheek.

“Love,” Sirius said, eyes still on his. A little of the formula dripped down his chin.

“Love?”

“You love me lots to feed me my bottle,” Sirius explained.

“I do,” Remus told him. “I love you so much. I’m glad you trust me.”

“I love you too,” Sirius said softly.

He wrapped his lips back around the teat, suckling at it.

“Are you thinking about anything else?” Remus asked curiously.

“Erm… the bottle is yummy. I think about that. I think… I like the feel of sucking on it. I think about how warm you are. I like that you’re holding me. I like being cuddly,” Sirius said, more formula dripping down his chin again. Remus wordlessly cleaned it up this time.

“I like that you’re cuddly too,” Remus said warmly.

“I’m all happy,” Sirius said. He suckled on the bottle again.

“I’m happy too,” Remus told him.

Sirius smiled around the teat, reaching up and running his fingers through Remus’s hair. Even though it was a little strange, Sirius was sweet like this. The bandaged fingers tugged more than usual, but Remus didn’t mind.

“I think about other stuff sometimes too,” Sirius told him. 

“Like what?” Remus asked, brushing his fingers through his hair.

“Erm,” Sirius hesitated. “Daddy’s bottle.”

“What do you mean?” Remus asked.

Sirius clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth a few times, in nervous thought. “Daddy’s special bottle- Daddy’s willy. I think about sucking on it,” he said.

Remus’s face heated and went red. 

“Not right now,” Sirius rushed to clarify. “But I do think about it sometimes.”

“What exactly do you think about?” Remus asked, puzzled.

“I think about Daddy feeding me- feeding me your willy like a bottle,” Sirius told him. His cheeks were rosy with embarrassment as he spoke.

Remus’s gaze flickered down to Sirius’s lips. He felt flustered yet interested by that new piece of information. He brought the bottle back to Sirius’s lips, letting him suckle again.

“Daddy angry?” Sirius asked softly.

“Not angry,” Remus reassured him. 

Sirius relaxed in his arms again and sighed. He suckled at the bottle again, holding onto Remus’s sweater.

“We’re not going to do that sort of thing for a while though, okay?” Remus said softly.

“Okay,” Sirius mumbled around the bottle. 

Remus tilted the bottle up a little more as Sirius reached the last of the formula, letting him suck it dry before pulling the bottle from his lips and setting it aside on the bedside table.

“Do you want to see my favourite toy?” Sirius asked him.

“I would like that,” Remus told him, smiling.

Sirius’s eyes lit up. He practically trotted across the bedroom. When he came back, he had his hands in front of him, guiding a palm sized toy motorcycle through the air in front of him. 

It was an excessive display of wandless magic, and during any other time, he would have grumped at Sirius for showing off. There was something oddly charming about Sirius making it soar through the air without his wand, almost like the childlike accidental magic that young witches and wizards were prone to at times. This had a sophistication to it that Remus wasn’t sure that he himself could manage, but Sirius and James had always been exceptional at charms. 

“That’s very nice,” Remus told him. 

“It’s my favorite,” Sirius said. A twirl of his fingers landed it on the bed, and he raced it around the bed playfully. 

“Do you drive it around often?” Remus asked.

“Sometimes– not too often, but I like making it do tricks,” Sirius said, making it do a figure eight and a jump.

“That’s impressive,” Remus said. 

“Thanks,” Sirius said with a grin. 

Remus watched as Sirius did a few more tricks with the motorbike, impressed by the spell. 

“Tired,” Sirius said after a moment of driving it around, letting the motorcycle drop.

“I bet,” Remus said. “That’s very difficult magic.”

Sirius beamed, but shook his head. “I’m slow,” he said. “Not difficult.”

“You’re not slow,” Remus said again, feeling his heart drop. He didn’t know how to deal with that sort of insecurity especially when it was a blatant falsehood. 

“Slow,” Sirius said softly with a shrug, he looked at his feet, shuffling awkwardly and self consciously.

“You’re not-”

“I’m friends with muggles and play with muggle toys and only slow children and squibs play with muggles,” Sirius mumbled.

Remus frowned, although he realized that he’d managed to get more out of Sirius by not confronting it directly than when he did mention his parents. “You’re not slow, and you’re not a squib,” he said quietly.

“Not a squib, but I am slow,” Sirius said. He climbed back up into Remus’s lap. “I like that I’m Daddy’s  _ only _ little boy.”

Remus wrapped his arms tightly around Sirius, holding him close to him. He remembered hearing that Sirius’s mother preferred Regulus. He rubbed circles over his back. It was absurd thinking of Sirius as slow when he had often gotten top marks in school with less effort than he himself had.

“You’re my only little boy,” Remus reassured him. 

“My Daddy,” Sirius said, clinging to him. He nuzzled against his chest. 

Remus kissed the top of his head again.

Sirius shifted a little. “I think I have to go to the loo,” he said.

Remus licked his lips. “You do?” he asked.

“I think so,” Sirius said.

“Do you want to use the loo?” Remus asked. He remembered him talking about having an ‘accident,’ but was willing to help him to the toilet if he wanted. 

“Oh... Maybe I don’t have to wee. It’s hard to tell sometimes, Daddy,” Sirius said softly.

Remus looked down at Sirius’s pyjama pants. “Do you feel like you need to wee?” he asked him.

“I dunno, Daddy,” Sirius said, although he squirmed in Remus’s lap. “How do you tell?”

Remus watched Sirius shift and squirm, wondering how much of this was for show and how badly he needed to go. “Does your tummy feel very full?”

“I dunno. I think. Maybe,” Sirius said.

“Does it feel full down here?” Remus asked, running his hand down his midriff, just above his pyjama bottoms.

“I think so,” Sirius said, squirming more. He genuinely looked a little uncomfortable, as if he’d held off on using the loo for too long.

“You might need to use the loo,” Remus said. “Do you want help?”

“I think I can wait. I don’t need to wee really badly. It’s comfy in bed and you’re really warm,” Sirius told him, hugging him tight. He was still squirming. 

“If you’re sure,” Remus said, holding him close.

They were quiet for several moments, just curled up together in each other’s arms. Sirius couldn’t stay still though, fidgeting frequently. 

Sirius wiggled in his lap again. “I think maybe I do have to wee after all, Daddy,” he said.

“Do you want to try?” Remus asked, beginning to get a bit frustrated in more ways than one. He needed to make up his mind. Sirius’s incessant wiggling and squirming in his lap caused friction, and the idea of watching him wet his pyjamas was exciting. He was tempted to ask Sirius to get off of his lap, just so he would be able to see when he let go. He wanted to tell him that he didn’t want Sirius using the loo, but that would break some of the immersion in their play.

Thankfully, Sirius scooted off of him without him asking. “I’m going to try. I really have to wee,” he said, although he didn’t move from the bed, just scooting back a little from Remus, looking at him.

Remus looked between his legs, watching intently. Sirius was sitting in an awkward looking position, bottom flat on the bed, with his legs bent at the knees and splayed to the sides forming a w shape. “Do you need help getting to the loo?” he asked again.

“I can’t, Daddy. I can’t get up. I have to wee too much,” Sirius whined. Even if he was feigning the problem, he pulled it off well, looking a bit strained and even as if this was all just on the edge of painful.

“You need to go to the loo, Sirius. Do you need Daddy’s help?” Remus asked, although he made no effort to get up or help him.

“Please Daddy? I’m going to wee. I can’t make it to the loo. I can’t. I’m… I’m weeing,” Sirius told him, looking down between his own legs. “I’m sorry, Daddy.”

Remus kept looking at his crotch. A moment later the red and gold fabric of the pyjama bottoms darkened as a wet spot formed between his legs. The wet spot bloomed outwards towards Sirius’s legs as the scent of urine filled the air.

Sirius sniffled fake whines and feigned crying as Remus watched him wet himself.

The liquid seeped through the fabric and dribbled onto the sheets before becoming a steady stream. Remus placed a hand to his own trousers, grasping himself through the fabric as he watched. He squeezed himself as the flow slowed to a trickle.

“Daddy, I had an accident,” Sirius whined pitifully, hand going to his flushed cheeks, wiping away nonexistent tears.

“I see that,” Remus said, voice throaty with want. 

“I’m sorry, Daddy,” Sirius whined.

“Don’t be sorry. It’s just an accident,” Remus told him. 

Sirius sniffled fake sniffles, nodding. “Accident,” he said, squirming. 

“May I touch you?” Remus asked Sirius. Seeing him all rosy cheeked, flustered and in soaked pyjama bottoms had him yearning to do more with him. 

Sirius looked up at him, eyes wide. He nodded. “Gentle, Daddy,” he whispered. 

Remus swallowed and nodded. “I’ll be gentle tonight,” he assured him. 

He leaned Sirius back and tugged down the wet pyjama bottoms and y-fronts. He paused midway down his thighs, surprised by the complete hairlessness of his crotch. Sirius had taken the time to either shave or wax himself clear of hair. He couldn’t fathom when Sirius would have found the time, although he supposed he could have used magic. 

Sirius squirmed as Remus tugged the pyjama bottoms off the rest of the way, just leaving him in his pyjama shirt. 

Remus traced his fingertips lightly over Sirius’s soft cock. Sirius made a soft delighted noise and slid his own hand down, wrapping bandaged fingers around his own shaft. 

“My willy feels good, Daddy,” Sirius whispered.

Remus just smiled and reached for the bedside table, grabbing out the lube that they kept stored there. 

Sirius bit his lip and squirmed, cheeks red. “I need to clean for that, Daddy,” he whispered, fingers still trailing lightly over his own cock. 

“I’ll take care of it,” Remus said softly. He conjured a cup. “Aguamenti,” he said, before charming the water to be warmer. He summoned the soap from the bath, and mixed it in the water. 

Remus lifted one of Sirius’s legs up. He poured some of the warm soapy water between his legs, the water mingling with the urine soaking the sheets. He washed over the outside of his opening, before washing him up inside with soapy fingers. 

Sirius had covered his eyes with his arm, hiding his face as Remus cleaned him up, although he was stroking his hardening cock. 

When Remus finished cleaning him up, he vanished the cup of water, wiping his hand with Sirius’s pyjama bottoms

“My poor boy had an accident,” Remus murmured.

“Dirty,” Sirius said softly, moving his arm away from his face and looking up at Remus. 

“I know. You’re all wet,” Remus said, undoing his belt buckle and trousers. He tugged them and his pants down. 

“Daddy’s willy,” Sirius whispered, pointing between his legs. 

Remus’s cheeks reddened. He tugged off his sweater and set his clothes aside. 

“I’m going to be very gentle,” Remus promised him, lifting Sirius’s legs up. His knees sank into the warm wet spot on the bed as he scooted closer. He wanted to take Sirius fast and rough in the urine soaked sheets, but the whispered words  _ ‘gentle, Daddy’ _ were still fresh in his mind. 

Sirius whimpered and nodded. He was still wet and looked at him needily. 

Remus slicked lube over his own cock and Sirius’s opening. He leaned down and pressed their lips together as he eased on top of him.

Sirius made desperate little sounds as they kissed, Remus taking control of the depth and firmness of their kiss. He pressed his cock to Sirius’s opening, and guided himself inside. 

“Daddy,” Sirius whimpered breathlessly against his lips. 

Remus groaned as he slid the rest of the way inside him, pausing to give Sirius time to adjust. 

“Hurts, Daddy,” Sirius whispered, biting his lip and rocking his hips against his. 

The needy look in Sirius’s eyes and movement of his hips indicated otherwise and sent a shiver down Remus’s spine. He moaned. “Does it really hurt?” he asked him. 

“No,” Sirius said in a lower throaty voice filled with need. He shook his head, looking up at Remus.

“Good,” Remus murmured, starting to thrust into him gently.

“Daddy it hurts,” Sirius whimpered in that higher pitched needy voice. 

Remus kissed his lips softly. “It will feel good soon,” he promised him, deciding not to question the choices in phrasing if it was turning on Sirius to use those words. He rocked his hips, grunting at the feel of tightness and heat around his cock.

“Daddy,” Sirius whimpered, matching the movements of Remus’s hips.

Remus groaned. “You’re a good boy Sirius,” he whispered. 

Sirius’s moan at those words was anything but high pitched. “Dad-dy,” he groaned, voice breaking on the word. He wrapped his legs around Remus’s waist and slid his arms around him. He made a keening noise.

“You’re such a good boy, Sirius. I’m going to make you feel extra special, because you’re such a good boy,” Remus told him.

“I’m good, Daddy,” Sirius whimpered, voice childish again, although he clutched at Remus and breathed heavily. “A good boy.”

“A very good boy,” Remus murmured, thrusts coming harder and quicker now. He held onto Sirius protectively.

“Daddy’s good boy. Good,” Sirius breathed.

“That’s right. You’re my very good little boy,” Remus told him. 

Sirius tightened his grip on Remus and let out a choked moan. He came against Remus’s stomach and his own, breathing heavily. 

Remus kissed his neck softly. “Can I be a little rougher?” he asked softly.

“Uh-huh,” Sirius mumbled agreeably, panting heavily. He didn’t manage to maintain the high pitch in spite of the effort. “Just hold me tight, Daddy.”

Remus groaned and thrust into him harder then. He clutched Sirius tighter and almost protectively both for leverage and the closeness. He thrust faster into him. 

“Harder, Daddy,” Sirius murmured lowly, breath hot and husky against Remus’s ear. 

He shuddered and thrust harder a few times. He grunted as he spilled out his release inside of him. He thrust erratically a few more times before stilling. He slowly eased out of Sirius, letting Sirius’s legs go limply back to the bed.

“Cold,” Sirius whined. 

“I know,” Remus murmured. He grabbed his wand and cleaned up the wet sheets with a wave of it. 

“No magic to clean me up, Daddy,” Sirius said softly.

“Okay, give me a minute,” Remus said. He hugged him tightly before slowly getting up and heading out of the bedroom. He grabbed a flannel and wet it with warm water before coming back. He cleaned himself with his wand and knelt on the bed next to Sirius.

“Warm,” Sirius murmured as Remus wiped up his midriff and between his legs.

“Better?” Remus asked. 

“Yes,” Sirius said softly. 

“Good,” Remus said. He lifted Sirius and moved him so that his head rested on one of the pillows. 

Sirius curled up and Remus curled around him, wrapping his arms around him tightly. He tugged the blankets up around him and turned out the lights without getting up, just waving them out with his wand. 

“I love you,” Sirius murmured, voice back to normal now, although he was still more cuddly than usual.

“I love you too,” Remus said softly.

“Thank you for doing all of that,” Sirius said quietly.

“I enjoyed it,” Remus admitted. 

“I’m glad,” Sirius said. He yawned tiredly. “Night.”

“Good night,” Remus murmured, kissing his neck softly. He couldn’t help but smile at the sleepy grin on Sirius’s face.

They both gradually dozed off into a relaxed and more solid night sleep than either of them had in a long time. 


	2. Chapter 2

 

All of their time together was near desperate. Remus still felt too indebted to Dumbledore to leave missions. Sirius hated that. He knew that Remus felt the need to repay Dumbledore for letting him attend Hogwarts as a werewolf, and yes, it was an important mission, but Sirius often missed him. They still had very little time together, even though it was much better than it had been. 

Remus hadn’t been by in a couple weeks now, and Sirius missed him. His flat was entirely too quiet without him, and he spent days with James and Lily when they weren’t focused on missions for the Order of the Phoenix. It helped with the loneliness. 

This evening consisted of dinner with James and Lily before heading back to his empty flat. He spent a while tinkering with his motorbike before heading inside. 

He was always hopeful that Remus would stop by, but as it grew later he gave up hope. 

He sighed and headed to the bath, drawing an overly warm one with extra bubbles. He sank down into the water and started washing off the grease and grime from working on the motorbike. 

The bath helped Sirius unwind a little. He’d had a rough few missions lately, and was out of sorts. Soaking in the warm sudsy water helped ease the tensions and put him in a better mindset. Still, catching sight of a Death Eater that had looked remarkably like Regulus had shaken him. 

He didn’t want to think about Regulus being a Death Eater. He didn’t like thinking about his family at all. 

The water was cool before he climbed out. He haphazardly dripped water on the floor before grabbing a towel and making his way to the bedroom. He dried his hair as much as he could with the towel, raking a comb through it. He settled onto the floor of his bedroom, pulling out the extendable case that he kept. 

The first thing that he took out was his stuffed toy lion. He hugged it to himself tightly. 

Sirius wanted to pretend to be small that night. He didn’t want to think about the Order of the Phoenix, his family, or Remus’s absence. 

He heard a faint cracking popping sound coming from the main room. He glanced up and towards the bedroom door. 

“Sirius, I’m back. It’s Remus,” he heard him call from the living room.

“I’m in here,” Sirius called back. “Not dressed though.”

Remus poked his head into the bedroom curiously. He frowned at the sight of Sirius sitting nude on the floor, just holding a toy.

“Are you okay?” Remus asked him worriedly.

“Bad couple weeks,” Sirius said with a shrug. “I was just…” He shrugged again and gestured at the toy lion and case of his other things that he used when he was pretending to be very little and young. 

“Do you… would you want me to…” Remus said, trailing off. 

“I…” Sirius said softly. He sighed and shrugged. 

Remus walked over to him then, kneeling down next to him on the rug. “Do you want me to take care of you tonight?” he asked, reaching out and cupping Sirius’s cheek.

Sirius licked his lips and swallowed. He let his eyes flutter shut as he leaned into his touch and nodded his head. “Please?” he asked softly.

“Okay,” Remus said gently. “Okay, my little boy. Let’s get you dressed.

Sirius opened his eyes, looking up at Remus. He had evidently gotten more comfortable with this during the time they spent apart. He wondered if he had done some reading about it, or if he’d spent time thinking about what they’d done together the last time they did this. Either way, he seemed more at ease with the role of ‘daddy’ and everything that came with it. 

Remus picked out a set of pajamas, finding a kitschy muggle shirt with a puppy on a bicycle that he was sure Sirius enjoyed. He found a matching pair of pyjama bottoms as well. He hesitated and frowned, looking in the case curiously.

“Is this a nappy?” Remus asked him curiously. 

“Erm, yes,” Sirius confirmed, fingers gripping his toy lion tighter. He cleared his throat, and when he spoke it was much higher and childish. “Just because… I’m bad at telling when I have to wee. And… sometimes for when I’m really small.”

Remus sucked air through his teeth and looked at Sirius almost pityingly. “Do you want to wear it tonight?” he asked.

“It’s okay either way. Daddy can choose,” Sirius said softly.

“Is there a difference between wearing it and not?” Remus asked him.

“The nappy holds the wee, isn’t messy, and feels nicer. I don’t mind having accidents though, and you’d be able to see it more without the nappy,” Sirius told him.

Remus glanced down between Sirius’s legs for just a second, before meeting his gaze again. “Which do you prefer?”

“Daddy can choose,” Sirius repeated, genuinely meaning it. He didn’t mind whichever Remus chose, although he could guess at what Remus preferred.

“We’ll do your big boy pants tonight,” Remus told him. “And if you have an accident, we can switch you to the nappy.”

“Okay, Daddy,” Sirius said with a smile. He  _ knew _ Remus preferred seeing him piss.

Remus grabbed out a pair of y-fronts for Sirius. He took hold of one of Sirius’s feet, getting it through the leg opening. He did the same with his other foot and tugged it up. “Lift your bum up,” Remus told him.

Sirius did as he was told, lifting up and letting Remus get his y-fronts properly in place. Remus tugged up his pyjama bottoms as well.

“Arms up,” he told him.

“Okay,” Sirius said softly, lifting his arms. He didn’t make it easy on Remus to thread his arms through the sleeves. He squirmed around, but Remus took it in stride, patiently helping him dress. 

“That’s better, right? I bet you were cold,” Remus said softly.

“Yes,” Sirius said softly. He scooted closer and wrapped his arms around Remus. “Daddy’s warm.” He nuzzled his face against the warmth of Remus’s chest. 

Remus wrapped his arms around him, and Sirius settled in his lap, hugging him tightly. 

“I missed you,” Sirius whispered.

“I missed you too,” Remus told him, patting his back.

“Hard week,” Sirius mumbled.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Remus asked him.

Sirius shrugged and hugged Remus tighter. “Maybe. Hard problems,” he told him.

Remus rubbed over his back. “Do you want me to feed you a bottle?”

“Yes, please,” Sirius said softly.

“Are you hungry too or just thirsty?” Remus asked. 

“You make cheese toasties?” Sirius asked him, eyes wide and hopeful.

“I will. You must be hungry then,” Remus said. Sirius clung to him so that Remus had to practically peel him off, which wasn’t entirely unusual for the both of them. He was still far more needy than he usually was.

Sirius immediately took his hand when he stood, following close behind him to the kitchen. “Cheese toasties first and then my bottle after we eat,” he told him.

“Okay,” Remus said, grabbing the bread and cheese. He readied the muggle toastie machine that Sirius had. “How many?” he asked.

“Just one, Daddy,” Sirius told him. He wasn’t that hungry, but liked the idea of being taken care of and fed.

“Just one it is,” Remus said, starting to cook the toastie. “Did you eat already?”

“A little,” Sirius told him.

“And your tummy isn’t too full?” Remus asked him, gently patting Sirius’s midriff. 

Sirius tugged his shirt up, looking down at his midriff. “Not too full, Daddy,” he told him, pointing to his pale well toned midsection. “My tummy is still a little hungry.”

“It’ll be full of cheese toastie in a minute,” Remus told him, taking it out of the machine and putting it on a plate for Sirius. 

“It smells good. Thank you,” Sirius told him. “Is it too hot to eat?”

“Yes, we need to let it cool down a minute,” Remus told him. 

“We’ll go sit at the table,” Sirius said, hurrying over. 

“Do you need to wash your hands before dinner?” Remus asked him. “Are they clean?”

“They’re clean,” Sirius said. “I took a bath before Daddy got home.”

“Good,” Remus said, sitting down with him at the table.

Sirius swung his legs. “How was your week, Daddy? Was it hard too?”

Remus looked hesitant. “A little,” he admitted.

“Daddy’s very brave, talking to lots of werewolves,” Sirius told him.

“It wasn’t too bad. Just a few arguments and scuffles these last couple of weeks,” Remus said.

“Daddy okay?” Sirius asked, concerned.

“Daddy’s fine,” Remus reassured him, reaching out and cupping his cheek.

Sirius leaned into his touch.

“Do you want to talk about your week now?” Remus asked gently.

Sirius looked up at him and frowned. “Once upon a time, there were two brothers and one was trying to be good and so was the other. They weren’t both good though. Sometimes they both did bad stuff, but one day the bigger brother saw the little brother in hooded cloaks doing stuff for dark wizards and You-Know-Who,” Sirius said quietly.

“I’m so sorry about Regulus. I know that we suspected, but that’s different from seeing him. What happened?” Remus asked.

“Well, the older brother just thought he recognized him. He didn’t know for sure. He yelled at their parents though. The little brother is too young to fight- especially on that side. There’s no getting out of it,” Sirius said quietly.

Remus sighed and raked his fingers through his hair. “You fought with your… he fought with his mother?” he asked. 

Sirius nodded, looking down. They had decided not to discuss his actual parents during all of this- he had even been the one to request it. Yet he was talking about them now, albeit in a very roundabout way. “He yelled and his mum yelled back. It was bad.”

“How bad?” Remus asked.

Sirius tried to figure out a way to express what was said during the fight, but just crumpled instead. He stood and went to Remus’s lap, tucking his head against his shoulder and sobbing. “It was really bad, Daddy. Really bad.”

Remus wrapped his arms around him tightly and held him close. He still smelled a little of the forest and tea leaves. He rocked Sirius in his arms, holding him close. 

“It was a bad fight. I don’t feel well. They all hate me. I hate them,” Sirius said, voice shaking as he spoke. He sniffled and clutched at Remus’s sweater, as if holding onto him tight enough would keep them together and both of them safe.

“I’m so sorry,” Remus said, patting his back and jiggling his legs to bounce Sirius on his lap.

“I’m a good boy and I don’t like feeling like a bad one. It’s my fault. If I had tried harder with Regulus or stayed instead of leaving he might not have joined the fucking Death Eaters,” Sirius said, childishness dropping out of his voice with the guilt and grief overtaking his words.

“It’s not your fault. You’re a very good-erm… it’s really not your fault Sirius. It’s not. Do you want to stop what we’re doing and go lay down?” Remus asked.

“No. I need this tonight,” Sirius mumbled, hiding his face against Remus’s neck. “I just… what if staying would have kept him from joining You-Know-Who? He’s either going to become a murderer or die himself. There’s no getting out of being a Death Eater.”

“It’s not your fault Sirius. You needed to leave your parents’ house. It wasn’t healthy. You’d be worse off now if you had stayed. I’m glad that you left,” Remus told him.

Sirius nodded. His heart still ached for his brother and the mess with his family hurt deeper than he could admit, but talking about it was difficult. It was easier to ignore the difficult aspects of the conversation and just seek desperately needed comfort.

“Daddy?” he said softly, voice back in the higher register. “I don’t want to be a bad boy. I hate being bad. No good. I hate it.”

“You’re not bad,” Remus reassured him, holding him tighter. “It’s not your fault. You’re not bad.”

“Too tight, Daddy,” Sirius told him with a childish dramatic huff as if all the air had been squeezed out of him and Remus loosened his hold a little.

“Sorry,” Remus said, taking hold of his shoulders and easing Sirius back enough that he had to look at Remus.

Remus wiped away the tears that were still rolling down his cheeks and kissed his forehead. “You’re Daddy’s good boy,” he whispered. “You’re very good. Very brave. I love you.”

“Daddy’s good boy,” Sirius echoed, clinging desperately to the words. “I love you too Daddy. I’m good?”

“Very good. You’re a very good little boy,” Remus told him, still wiping away tears.

Sirius smiled through his tears then and nodded. “Daddy’s special little boy,” he said softly, the love and approval helping calm his fears that he wasn’t any good after all or too like his own family.

“Feel any better?” Remus asked him.

“Yes. I still want my cheese toastie Daddy,” Sirius reminded him gently.

“It should be cool enough to eat now,” Remus said, politely pulling away. 

“Hungry,” Sirius said brightly with a smile. He took a few bites of the warm melted cheese.

“Is it good?” Remus asked.

“It’s yummy,” Sirius said around a mouthful of the cheese toastie.

“I’m glad,” Remus said, smiling. “Not too soggy?”

“No. I love toasties,” Sirius told him. He ate it happily, content with the simple comfort food. 

When he had finished, he still had cheese and crumbs on the corner of his mouth. He felt satisfied.

“Let’s clean you up a bit,” Remus said, pointing his wand to clean up the mess.

Sirius flinched and shut his eyes, as if bracing himself for an unpleasant spell. Remus’s breath caught and he lowered his wand before casting anything. He looked at Sirius’s tightly scrunched shut eyes worriedly.

One eye peeked open, then the other, looking at Remus cautiously.

“Do you want me to clean it the muggle way instead?” Remus asked him.

“Please?” Sirius said, voice shaky.

Remus stood and grabbed a flannel, wetting it at the sink. He came back and started gently wiping the crumbs from Sirius’s face, very gentle with his touches. “Are you okay?” he asked him. The flannel had warmer water rather than cool, and felt pleasant.

“Mum used overly rough cleaning spells sometimes. And if I made a mess when I got older, she’d use a mild hex or two,” Sirius mumbled, voice dropping into a slightly lower register.

“I’m so sorry,” Remus said quietly. He finished wiping up Sirius’s face, cupping his cheek and looked at him with concern.

“All better, Daddy,” Sirius said brightly, voice back at a higher pitch again.

Remus took a breath and sighed. “All better,” he echoed, even though he knew the underlying issues weren’t as easy to clean up as the bit of cheese that had been on the corners of Sirius’s mouth. “I’ll warm up your bottle.”

“Okay,” Sirius said, following closely behind him to the kitchen again. 

He hopped up onto the counter near Remus, swinging his legs.

Sirius watched as Remus prepared his bottle, appreciating the gentle smile that lingered on Remus’s face. 

After a moment of quiet between them, Sirius slipped his own hand under the elastic of his pyjama bottoms and into his y-fronts. He kept watching Remus as he gently fondled himself, legs still swinging.

Remus mixed the formula in the bottle and turned off the stove top. He caught sight of Sirius and did a double take.

“What are you doing there?” Remus asked, gaze falling between Sirius’s legs.

“I have my hand in my pants,” Sirius said.

“I see that. What are you doing exactly?” Remus asked.

“Playing with my willy,” Sirius answered plainly without an ounce of shame in his childish voice.

“Oh,” Remus said, clearly not having expected that answer. Sirius wasn’t entirely sure what answer he  _ did _ expect. “Do you want any help?”

“No. Just playing with it,” Sirius told him, giving himself a gentle squeeze. “It’s soft. Just soft. I was bored. It’s my third favorite toy to play with.” He slid his hand out of his pants and hopped down off of the counter.

“What’s your favorite toy to play with?” Remus asked curiously, following him into the bedroom with the bottle.

“My toy motorbike, remember?” Sirius reminded him. “And then Daddy’s willy is my second favorite.”

“I don’t know how I should feel about mine only being your second favorite,” Remus said with a chuckle.

Sirius plopped down on the bed and grinned. “Maybe Daddy can change my mind,” he said.

“I might,” Remus told him. He propped himself up with pillows and tugged Sirius into his lap. “Do you want your bottle now?”

“Yes, please,” Sirius said softly. He parted his lips.

He eagerly latched around the teat of the bottle when Remus brought it to his lips. The warm formula was immediately soothing. He suckled at it, the sweet taste filling his mouth. He didn’t even mind the occasional chalky texture of it, most of the formula just creamy and a bit of a treat.

He kept looking up at Remus as he suckled, gaze flickering from his light brown hair to his eyes, his lips, and the faint scars. He reached up and toyed with his hair as he suckled down more of the formula.

“What are you thinking about?” Remus asked softly.

“You’re handsome, Daddy,” Sirius told him. Remus wiped up a dribble of the formula.

“Thank you,” Remus said, looking a little embarrassed. He was never great at accepting compliments about his appearance, too bothered by the scars to fully believe them.

“I love you, Daddy,” Sirius told him. That one was easier for Remus to accept and made his eyes light up. He lightly grasped Remus’s sweater.

“I love you too, little one,” Remus told him.

Sirius smiled and wrapped his lips back around the teat of the bottle.

They were both quiet for a while as he drank. 

Eventually he worked his free hand down beyond the elastic of his pyjama bottoms and pants again. He kept grasping Remus’s sweater with the other hand.

“Are you playing with your willy again?” Remus asked him.

“Yes,” Sirius said softly, wrapping his fingers around his soft length.

“Could Daddy watch?” Remus asked him gently.

Sirius nodded around his bottle.

Remus tugged down Sirius’s pyjama bottoms and y-fronts to his mid thighs. He kept holding the bottle for Sirius, but his gaze was between his legs.

“Just playing with it, Daddy,” Sirius reminded him. He was still soft. 

“I see that,” Remus told him.

Sirius suckled more at the bottle. He ran his fingers down the length and toyed with his foreskin, not using any particular technique- just touching almost exploratorily.

Remus lightly rubbed over Sirius’s midriff, making him smile around the bottle.

“Tummy rub,” Sirius murmured. Remus’s fingers were warm against his skin, contrasting nicely with the cool air.

Remus smiled and kept rubbing over his midriff. He watched as Sirius kept gently fondling his soft cock.

“Is this… is this doing anything for you?” Remus asked hesitantly.

“A little. Mostly just playing, Daddy. It’s nice. Calming,” Sirius said, a little embarrassed. He wasn’t sure that Remus had really understood that he wasn’t trying for anything more than just playing with himself. It was soothing.

“It’s okay. You can keep doing it. It’s just that it is doing something for me,” Remus told him. “Does that bother you?”

“No. It’s okay Daddy. I would tell you if it bothered me. I can tell you like it,” Sirius said softly. He hadn’t been too conscious of it before, but Remus’s erection was pressed up against his lower back as he lay in his lap.

“Okay,” Remus said softly. 

Sirius squeezed himself gently as he drank more of the bottle. He toyed with his foreskin, moving it over the head and tugging gently. It was more to keep his fingers busy than for pleasure. Remus kept lightly rubbing his midriff.

“All gone,” Sirius whispered once he finished the bottle.

Remus set the bottle on the bedside table. He traced his fingers a little lower, just above Sirius’s now half hard cock. “Do you want help with your willy?” he asked him.

“Not yet,” Sirius said softly, cheeks flushed. “I want another bottle.” He tugged his pyjama bottoms back up.

“Still thirsty?” Remus asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Yes,” Sirius said softly. 

When Remus started to get up, Sirius grabbed his arm and wrapped both of his arms around it, holding him in place. “Not that bottle. Daddy’s special bottle,” Sirius whispered.

Remus looked down at him startled, but needy.

“Okay,” he said quietly. He undid his belt buckle and tugged his trousers down and off, placing them on the bedside table.

Sirius licked his lips and looked between Remus’s legs, running his hand over his thigh gently. “How do you want me Daddy? How do you want to feed me?” he asked in a nearly shy whisper.

“Just… lay down,” Remus told him. He propped a few pillows up and patted them.

Sirius lay back against the pillows, inclined but laying on his back.

Remus slid onto the bed, straddling Sirius with his knees on either side of his shoulders.

Sirius licked his lips, gazing up at Remus. “Hungry, Daddy,” Sirius told him.

Remus groaned although it nearly came out as a growl. “Daddy’s got your special bottle,” he told him. He gripped himself loosely, looking down at Sirius’s lips.

Sirius’s cheeks heated. He was certain that he was flushed red all the way down his chest. “Feed me?” he asked softly.

Remus shifted closer, holding his cock to Sirius’s lips.

Sirius gently wrapped his lips around the tip and suckled softly, cheeks bright red. He tugged almost clumsily at Remus’s foreskin with his sucking motions, as if he were small enough to not know what he was doing. 

He was a little worried that Remus might get irritable and ask him to suck him off properly, but a string of curses poured from his mouth and he cupped Sirius’s cheek with his free hand. He held his cock to Sirius’s mouth with the other.

“Such a good little boy,” Remus told him. “Very good. You’re making Daddy very happy.”

“Yummy,” Sirius said softly, the precome stringing between his lips and Remus’s cock and the faintly salty taste lingering on his tongue.

“That’s right. Keep drinking your yummy bottle,” Remus told him, nudging Sirius’s mouth with his cock until he started suckling again.

Sirius let out a small hum and sucked at him, just focused on his own enjoyment and the soothing nature of suckling. He licked at the head of Remus’s cock clumsily, as if none of this were deliberate skill.

“Good boy, Sirius. You’re Daddy’s good little boy,” Remus told him. “Do you want to try sucking harder to get Daddy’s milk out?”

“Yea,” Sirius said, the word not quite coming out clearly around Remus’s cock. He suckled at him harder, taking a bit more of his cock into his mouth.

“Very good. You’re such a special little boy. Just like that. Good boy,” Remus told him. He moaned and grunted softly, fingers tracing over Sirius’s jaw.

“Goo’ boy,” Sirius said around him, nearly gagging as Remus thrust almost involuntarily.

“That’s right,” Remus told him. “Can you be extra good and do Daddy a favour?”

“Uh-huh,” Sirius mumbled around him, suckling more.

“Daddy wants you to pick. You can be a _very_ good boy and suck extra hard on Daddy’s bottle and hold onto it with your hands too- or you can be a very good boy and let me feed you how Daddy wants,” Remus told him.

Sirius pulled back enough to let Remus’s cock slip from his mouth and speak. “Daddy feed me?” he asked softly.

“I might be a little rough. Are you sure that you want Daddy to feed you?” Remus asked, running his fingers through Sirius’s hair.

Sirius licked his still wet lips and nodded. “Daddy feed me,” he whispered.

Remus swallowed and nodded. “Let me know if it’s too rough, little one. You’re a very good boy,” he told him.

“Daddy’s special little boy,” Sirius whispered, looking up at him.

“Very special,” Remus told him as he slid his cock into Sirius’s mouth again. 

This time he curled his fingers in Sirius’s hair and started rocking his hips.

Sirius suckled at his length as Remus’s thatch of hair skimmed his nose. He kept suckling a bit clumsily which drew a needy groan from Remus.

He gagged and felt his eyes water as Remus thrust harder and deeper into his mouth. The first few overly rough thrusts might have been accidental, but Remus kept Sirius’s head still and kept thrusting.

Sirius was just on the verge of asking for him to be a bit more gentle when Remus spoke, words melting his discomfort.

“You’re a good boy, Sirius. Very good. I know it’s very hard, but you’re doing such a good job,” Remus told him, running his fingers through his hair.

Sirius made a soft sound in reply, suckling with more enthusiasm. 

“That’s it, that’s a good boy,” Remus told him, thrusting faster and harder.

Sirius gagged again and just accepted that he was going to keep gagging as Remus thrust into his mouth, chasing after his own pleasure. He breathed heavily when he could, sucking down Remus’s cock and his own spit when he couldn’t.

Remus groaned and stiffened. Sirius swallowed down Remus’s release, mouth full of the salty bitter liquid.

Remus pulled out of his mouth and sank down onto the bed beside of him.

Sirius breathed heavily as he caught his breath. Remus’s fingers rested on his cheeks, gently wiping away tears that he hadn’t realized that he’d been shedding.

“You’re such a good boy,” Remus whispered, gathering him into his arms and hugging him tightly.

“I did good?” Sirius asked, surprised by how shaky his own voice was.

“Very good. Daddy’s sorry. I won’t be so rough next time. I didn’t realize that I was being that rough,” Remus told him, stroking his fingers lightly over Sirius’s still red cheeks. 

“You weren’t too rough, Daddy. I made Daddy happy?” Sirius asked.

“Very happy,”. Remus assured him. “You were very good. Daddy will be more gentle next time.”

“It’s okay. Daddy wasn’t too rough,” Sirius insisted.

“Still… I’ll be more gentle,” Remus said quietly, unable to take his gaze away from Sirius’s red watery eyes and reddened lips. “Daddy wants you to always feel good too.”

“I do feel good. Daddy makes me happy,” Sirius told him, wrapping his arms around him tightly. “I’m a good boy?”

“You’re very good,” Remus reassured him, patting his back. “Next time, tell Daddy if I’m too rough.”

Sirius shrugged and nodded, tucking against him. “Not too rough,” he said reassured him again.

Remus sighed and just held him close, resting with him. He shut his eyes, rocking Sirius gently in his arms. 

“Cozy,” Sirius murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to Remus’s neck.

“It is,” Remus agreed. He paused for a second. “Do you want Daddy to help you play with your willy now?”

Sirius blushed and laughed. “I… soon,” he said softly. He dropped his voice to a very quiet childish whisper. “I want to have an accident first. I can’t wee if my willy is too happy.”

“Is your willy ‘happy’ right now?” Remus asked curiously.

“Yes. It feels good. It got happy when I drank Daddy’s special bottle,” Sirius said softly, no longer whispering.

“Can I see?” Remus asked him.

Sirius laughed and ducked his head in embarrassment. “Your not making it any easier to wee, you know,” he said, childish tone dropping for just a moment. In spite of his words, he did tug his pyjama bottoms out so that Remus could take a look.

“Do you need to?” Remus asked curiously, although he did peek down into Sirius’s pyjama bottoms. “I doubt you can wee with your willy  _ that _ happy.”

Sirius whined. “I want to, Daddy,” he said, voice slipping back into the higher register. He let the elastic of his pyjama bottoms snap back. “I just can’t wee.”

“Do you want me to play with your willy?” Remus asked him gently.

“I don’t know!” Sirius said, more bratty and frustrated than he had intended.

Remus frowned. “You can still have an accident afterwards if you’d like,” he said. 

Sirius whined again. “If we do that can we still play and stuff after?” he asked. He wasn’t ready for this to stop.

“I promise that we can still play,” Remus told him.

Sirius nodded and cuddled up close to him.”Okay, Daddy. My willy feels funny,” he told him.

“It feels funny? What does it feel like?” Remus asked him, running his hand down Sirius’s midriff and between his legs.

Sirius shuddered and felt his cheeks heat as they went rosy colored at the feeling of Remus fondling him through his pyjama bottoms.

“What does it feel like?” Remus asked him again.

“It just feels funny. It feels good,” Sirius told him, cheeks flushed and eyelids partly shut with arousal. 

Remus tugged his y-fronts and pyjama bottoms down around his thighs. He traced his fingertips lightly over Sirius’s length.

“Daddy,” Sirius whispered, pressing up to his hand.

“You’ve been a very good boy,” Remus told him, starting to stroke over him gently.

“I like that you’re playing with my willy, Daddy,” Sirius told him, still somehow managing to look and sound innocent in spite of what they were doing.

“I’m glad. Daddy likes making you feel nice. You’re very special,” Remus told him as he tightened his grip.

“Daddy’s good boy,” Sirius grunted, thrusting up into his hand. He managed to keep his voice higher in spite of the arousal.

“Daddy’s very good and special boy,” Remus told him, stroking over him faster.

“Very good? I make Daddy happy?” Sirius asked breathlessly. He couldn’t help the need for approval or how the praise was making him feel. He clutched at Remus’s sweater as he thrust up into his hand.

“You make Daddy very proud and happy. You’re very good,” he told him. Remus kept stroking over his cock steadily, watching him. “Come on, Sirius. You’re doing so well. Daddy wants to see you feel extra special.”

Sirius whimpered, thrusting up into Remus’s hand erratically now. “Tell me I’m a good boy again, Daddy. Please?”

Remus looked perplexed for a second, but didn’t verbally question it. “You’re very good Sirius. You’re Daddy’s little boy. You’re doing so good. Daddy loves his special good little boy. You’re very good,” Remus told him as he stroked steadily.

A sharp gasp followed his words and then Sirius was tensing. He spilled his release over Remus’s hand, thrusting clumsily. He panted heavily, whimpering. “Good,” he whispered shakily.

“Very good,” Remus murmured, stilling his hand.

“Messy,” Sirius whispered breathlessly, fingers going to rest over Remus’s sticky ones. He panted as he caught his breath. “All messy. Not an accident. I made a mess, Daddy.”

“I’ll get you cleaned up,” Remus told him, summoning a flannel, wetting it, and wiping his cock clean, touches very gentle. Sirius still squirmed underneath his touches.

“Cleaning my willy,” Sirius whispered, watching Remus the entire time.

“Still sensitive,” Remus said, patting him dry carefully.

“Sensitive,” Sirius agreed. “Very gentle.”

“Do you feel better?” Remus asked.

“Happy. Love you, Daddy,” Sirius told him, smiling up at him. He was satisfied, with still red cheeks and barely opened eyes. 

“I love you too,” Remus told him, setting the flannel aside.  “You’re adorable, you know that right?”

“Daddy’s adorable baby boy,” Sirius whispered, smiling.

Remus chuckled. He tugged up Sirius’s pyjama bottoms and held him closer.

“So happy, Daddy,” Sirius told him, hugging him tightly. He yawned.

“Sleepy?” Remus asked him.

“No. I want to wee,” Sirius mumbled, although he was tired. He felt sleepy and lazy after his climax, content to cuddle up to Remus and rest. He just also still wanted to have an ‘accident’ in spite of the tiredness.

“All right,” Remus said quietly, sounding unconvinced.

“I’m going to- in a minute,” Sirius told him.

“Let’s lay down for a bit then,” Remus told him.

“I’m really going to wee. I’ve got to wee before bed. I just… my willy is just shy,” Sirius told him.

“Okay. Let’s still lay down,” Remus told him, easing them back onto the bed entirely. He rested his head on the pillow and wrapped his arms around Sirius.

Sirius whined, but curled up with Remus, tucking closer. He relaxed a little as Remus rubbed his back. He yawned again.

“Sleepy little one,” Remus murmured.

“Sleepy,” Sirius confirmed quietly. He opened his eyes, lazily looking at Remus before shutting them again.

Remus kissed his forehead lightly.

Sirius sighed and snuggled closer, pressed up against Remus.

They lay together quietly for several moments, just enjoying the closeness.

“Do you want to go use the loo?” Remus asked him, right as Sirius was about to drop off to sleep.

Sirius bit his tongue to keep from smirking as a thought occurred to him. He feigned sleep.

“Sirius?” Remus whispered after a moment.

They were both quiet again.

Remus tugged the blankets up around them and turned off the lights with a wave of his wand.

“Goodnight,” Remus whispered almost inaudibly to avoid waking him.

Sirius lay still, just resting tucked up against Remus for a long while.

When he felt as if an appropriate amount of time had passed, and developed concern that Remus might fall asleep soon, he tried to work up his nerve.

It took a while of struggling, his body’s instincts and ingrained habits against creating a mess fighting against him every step of the way. Eventually well trained muscles relaxed, and a few dribbles of urine seeped out into his y-fronts.

After having immediately stopped the flow out of ingrained nervousness, it took a second to work back up to it again.

He kept his breathing even as if he really were asleep and having an accident. Slowly he released a steady flow. The hot liquid seeped through his y-fronts and pyjama bottoms.

Remus’s breath hitched. “Sirius?” he said softly.

He kept feigning sleep, knowing that he was completely soaking Remus as well as himself.

Remus gently shook his shoulder. “Shit. Sirius,” he whispered.

“Yeah?” Sirius asked, voice sounding groggy and heavy with sleep. His flow slowed to a trickle before stopping.

“You had an accident,” Remus whispered, rubbing over his shoulder.

“Sorry, Daddy,” Sirius said quietly.

Remus grabbed his wand and lit up the room so that they could see.

He peeled back the soaked sheets, looking at the mess that Sirius had made.

“I forgot to go wee before bed,” Sirius said softly. 

Remus licked his lips. “Fuck,” he said. He tugged his own trousers down and off. “You just had an accident. It’s okay, little one.”

“I’m sorry, Daddy,” Sirius told him.

“It’s okay. It was an accident. Daddy should have made you go to the loo before bed,” Remus reassured him. “Are you awake enough for Daddy to…?”

“Awake enough, Daddy,” Sirius said softly, cheeks flushed.

Remus slid fully on top of him then. He slid his already hard cock between Sirius’s thighs and started thrusting, the wet fabric tugging around with his movements. “Keep your legs tightly together for me,” Remus told him.

“I’ll do a good job, Daddy,” Sirius told him, pressing his thighs together tightly as Remus thrust between them.

“Very good,” Remus breathed the words next to his ear. He panted heavily, his thrusts rough and frantic. “I can’t believe you wet yourself.”

“Accident. I couldn’t help it,” Sirius told him, voice extra soft.

Remus groaned at that. He thrust more roughly. 

“I didn’t mean to wee the bed,” Sirius told him. “We’re all wet.”

“Fuck,” Remus groaned. It didn’t take much longer before he clutched Sirius’s shoulders tightly, crying out as he came.

He lay on top of Sirius as he caught his breath.

Sirius hugged Remus, smiling and pressing kisses to his neck.

“That was really good,” Remus murmured. “So good.”

Sirius smiled up at him. 

“Did you really have an actual accident?” Remus asked curiously.

Sirius blushed and laughed. “Not telling,” he said.

“Hm. It was nice pretending that you did,” Remus murmured.

Sirius smirked. “I thought so,” he said.

“Do you want cleaned up?” Remus asked.

Sirius bit his lip and nodded. “I had an accident and am all messy, Daddy. All wet,” he told him, feigning a few whines and sniffles.

Remus slowly sat up. He tugged Sirius’s wet and sticky pyjama bottoms off and spelled them clean. He set them aside on the bedside table. He slid off the pyjama top, cleaning it and adding it to the pile as well.

“Do you want a nappy?” Remus asked as he tugged off Sirius’s y-fronts.

“I have accidents, Daddy. Should I wear a nappy?” Sirius asked softly, a note of hopefulness in his voice.

“We’ll put you in a nappy for tonight. You can wear big boy pants tomorrow,” Remus told him. He tossed the y-fronts into a hamper and summoned a nappy from Sirius’s case of stuff.

He spelled himself and the bedsheets clean before summoning a clean flannel. “Aguamenti,” he said softly before warming the water.

Sirius smiled as Remus brought the warm flannel between his legs, very gently wiping his thighs, waist, and finally cock clean. He was careful and soothing about it.

“Daddy cleaning me,” Sirius whispered, spreading his legs to help Remus reach the areas that were still wet.

“Just a little accident,” Remus said softly. He tugged back Sirius’s foreskin to gently wipe the slit and head clean.

“Feels good,” Sirius whispered.

“Do you want Daddy to clean you more?” Remus asked lightly.

“My willy is too sleepy now to be happy,” Sirius told him, cheeks flushed.

“Okay,” Remus said. He put the flannel away. 

He spread out the nappy and gently tugged Sirius’s hips onto it, adjusting him. He tucked Sirius’s cock down to prevent any leaks.

“Cream or powder Daddy?” Sirius asked hopefully.

“Do you have cream or powder?” Remus asked him.

“Both,” Sirius said softly.

“Which do you prefer?” Remus asked.

“Daddy pick,” Sirius told him, cheeks flushed.

Remus pursed his lips, looking thoughtful for a moment. He summoned the powder. “We’ll do cream a different time when your willy can wake up,” he told him.

“Good idea, Daddy,” Sirius said softly.

Remus gently spread the powder over him and tucked his cock again, bringing the front of the nappy up and fastening it.

“Clean,” Sirius whispered, cheeks red. “Daddy doesn’t mind the nappy?”

“I don’t mind,” Remus reassured him. “You’re adorable.”

Sirius grinned and hid his face against Remus shyly. 

“Let’s get you ready for bed,” Remus told him.

“Bedtime,” Sirius agreed.

Remus helped him dress in his now clean pyjamas again, carefully tugging them into place. When he finished dressing Sirius, he turned the lights out again, holding him close.

“Night night, Daddy,” Sirius whispered.

“Good night,” Remus murmured. He kissed his cheek.

Sirius snuggled up close against him, shutting his eyes and smiling contentedly. He listened to Remus’s steady breathing and slowly dozed off in his arms.

**Author's Note:**

> Anywayyy I'm predictable enough with my fic by now that at least a few people could hazard a guess as to who I am. :P If you figure it out and want to say hi or rp something similar to this or something, just send me a message.


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